NN&V Exclusive
(Lori Piotrowski) – At least once a day I hear how Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney isn’t electable because he’s not down-to-earth. His hair’s too perfect. He’s too handsome. People can’t relate to him.
Maybe what the candidate needs is a little humor. To lighten things up, I suggest that Mitt adopt a mascot a la college sports. Ohio State has Brutus Buckeye; UCLA has Joe Bruin; and Romney’s Brigham Young University has Cosmo Cougar.
In 2008, women working the caucus on behalf of Romney had adopted the name “mittens.” Cute. (Everybody say, “Ahhhhh.”) Let’s cogitate on that for a minute.
Ann Romney could be the First Mitten. MOTUS is a much better moniker for the First Lady of the United States than FLOTUS. POTUS and MOTUS. I kinda like that.
All the female workers could be mittens, but mitten is just too feminine a connotation for the guys. How about baseball “mitts”? During rallies, women could wear mittens (keeping warm in these cold winter months) and men could wave baseball mitts. I can envision life-sized versions on the sidelines dancing to Kid Rock’s “Born Free.”
As MOTUS, Ann Romney’s pet project could be to encourage knitters throughout the country to fashion mittens and watch caps for the military and homeless. Elementary schoolchildren could sell homemade mittens instead of candy. That might even make the current FLOTUS happy as Americans wouldn’t be enjoying candy.
Newt Gingrich could use a mascot, too. Perhaps an oversized mortarboard?
Ron Paul could adopt a change purse, and Perry a 10-gallon Stetson. Bouncing fortune cookies could trail John Huntsman. And for Rick Santorum? A lump of coal.
Take today’s poll: Who, if anyone, should drop out of the Republican Presidential race?