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Opinion

Sweet Home Chicago? Live in Or Grow Up in Illinois and You’ll Understand

Sweet Home Chicago? Live in Or Grow Up in Illinois and You’ll Understand
Chuck Muth
April 3, 2019

Six and three is nine

Nine and nine is eighteen

Look there brother baby and see what I’ve seen

Hidehey

Baby don’t you wanna go

Back to that same old place

Sweet home Chicago

If Jussie Smollett isn’t at least whistling this old blues tune highlighted in the classic movie “The Blues Brothers” he’s even dumber than he looked when he got caught faking a so-called hate crime.  And make no mistake.  He got caught with his panties down around his ankles by the Chicago Police Department.

While we still have never seen this clown on a TV show, we have to admire his lawyers’ understanding of how identity politics works in Chicago.

They managed to get a hopelessly conflicted, elected State’s Attorney to drop all charges against the little queen after he was indicted by a Grand Jury on 16 felony counts.  Her conflict, apparently, was between her patron Saint Michelle Obama and reality.  Imagine if a Federal Grand Jury had indicted the President and the Attorney General decided not to prosecute.

It was completely predictable.  As it happened, I was in Chicago the week Ms. Hopelessly Conflicted Prosecutor was warming up for something like this and now, she’s busy defending her office by suggesting—among other things—that she saved the taxpayers’ money.

The actual assistant State’s Attorney who handled the case said it wasn’t an exoneration and Smollett said he didn’t do it.  The Mayor said he did do it, a Grand Jury said he did and the Police Superintendent said he did.

If Joliet Jake (John Belushi) were still alive, he would have probably been proud of Smollett.  Or, maybe not, because at least Jake did his time.

The only problem with Smollett’s legal tactic was the unanticipated consequences of Federal involvement.  It takes a lot to put President Trump, Rahm Emanuel and the Chicago Police Department on essentially the same page, but Jussie Smollett did it.  Trump has announced that the Federal Government is looking into the case.  This could be the Rodney King case of the 21st Century where we get to explain to students who went to school after the teachers’ union took over, that double jeopardy does not attach in such situations.

This is the way it works in Chicago and has worked from time immemorial.  Remember, this is Illinois where being Governor is prep school for prison and the TV show, The Good Wife was either a documentary or a soap opera depending on where you live or grew up.

It’s also hard for someone who grew up in Illinois not to see some parallels to the Blues Brothers.

Mayor Emanuel and the Chicago Police Department have threatened to sue Smollett for the $130,000 they say was expended pulling his panties down after he filed a false police report.  And Emanuel—in an attempt to keep his street cred with the left, told the President to butt out.

Smollett’s lawyers say that he doesn’t owe the city an apology but rather the Mayor and the Police owe HIM an apology for dragging his name through the mud.

Right.

That’s like Al Capone suing Chicago for letting him under-report his income.

The biggest problem with the entire nation seeing a clownshow like this one is that not everyone grew up or lives in Illinois so there is a huge group of people out there who don’t understand the Chicago Way and don’t understand that in Chicago, truth is often stranger than fiction.

As we’ve observed before, maybe Law and Order’s Dick Wolf will explain it to the audience writ large with a one or two episode show next season on Chicago PD, ripped from the headlines.  That he didn’t come up with a scenario similar to this up to now is only a reminder that you cannot make this stuff up.

Sweet Home Chicago, indeed.

By

FRED WEINBERG

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